Wednesday, May 20, 2015

Walking Wounded

As I wait for my dinner, I'm listening to my YouTube playlist.  Walking Wounded by The Tea Party is playing now.  After my counselling session today, I feel like I'm "walking wounded" ... well, wheeling wounded anyway.

I talked about many things to my counsellor today, but one thing continues to circle around in my brain.  Fifteen years ago, Rob was in the hospital, deathly ill with pancreatitis. The doctors told me that he only had a 15% chance of his survival. Scared beyond belief, not knowing what else to do, I visited Rob twice a day, every day for six weeks, and I would sit by his bedside holding his hand for hours at a time.

Rob recovered, got stronger and healthier.  I thought I'd have him longer than I did.

As I told this story to my counsellor, I heard Adele's Rolling in the Deep echoing in my head.  "We could have had it allllllllllllllll, rolling in the deeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep!"  It's not fair that Rob's not with me, after everything we'd gone through throughout the years.

But then whoever said that life is fair? Certainly not I.

Ok, time to distract myself ..... Mac & Cheese from Hair of the Dog and Merlin on Netflix.

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