Friday, June 27, 2008

Hi! Me again, ready to talk about my day.

Well, first of all, Sarah and I didn't meet Jen this afternoon like we usually do. No more weekly filming. No more venting about the injustices of the w0rld. I'll miss that. I'll miss Jen. I'll have to make sure to upload the films we did to YouTube. And, I'll have to make sure to start socking away money so I can visit Jen and Nic in Berkley next year, so we can film and rage against the machine again.

I did have my daily Iced Cap, though. That soothed my ravaged soul, like it usually does. What could be better than cold, caffeinated goodness? Mmmmmm............

Painting, actually, would have been wonderful too. I look at my easel with lustful eyes. It's been so long since I dipped my finger into the coolness of the acrylic paints and started to get lost in the creative process of doing a painting.

Where oh where is my own beloved, paint-splattered wheelchair? I hate the one HME lent to me. It's a bloody lemon and I can't paint in it. Weeks, they said, it'll be fixed sometime within a few weeks. I'll probably go crazy before then!

It's 10pm now, and I hear the Pride festivities going on outside. I'd love to run outside and join the fun, but I have to go to bed because I have to get up at 6am to go to sell my art at St. Lawrence Market.

To bed... and snuggle up to my cats until the dawn comes...

Wednesday, June 25, 2008

Memories of New York

Hi, I've finally set aside some time to talk about my New York trip. Well, when it was happening to me I was thinking about talking about the not so great things. Suffice to say, Greyhound buses have a lot to learn about accessibility and not being abllist. And New York subways definitely have got to improve.

However, besides all that, Lenny and I had a fantastic time. We stayed in Brooklyn with Lenny's friends. We went out every night, not just with Lenny's friends, but with people from the conference aswell. And I found a new tasty treat, chocolate beer. I wonder if they have it here?

People in New York were fantastic. It was so funny when Lenny and I first got into town, I was having trouble getting up a curb, and this guy came up to me and started pushing my chair and saying., "would you like some help? Would you like some help?" Lenny and I were like, "no, no. Thank you, I'm fine." So the guy backed off and said, "oh...", and then a second later, "well fuck you then!." Lenny and I laughed are heads off for maybe ten minutes. What a welcome to New York!

Then there was another funny incident. I was eating gelato ice cream with Lenny and Jay when this guy in a wheelchair came up to us. He was wearing a crazy wig and carrying a portable radio. He sat in front of me and began to dance, so I also began to dance. It was so much fun! The he got one dollar from someone on the street, and he gave it to me. So in return I gave him a pack of cards.

One thing I found refreshing was that when we went into a restaurant or bar, the waiters would talk to me directly. And generally i found that people were more respectful to me than they seem in Toronto. I love New York. Oh yes, one other thing that is better in New York than in Toronto is that people with disabilities can choose who works for them to assist them with their daily needs. Here, if you get attendant services through an agency, you can't choose. And because of this fact, people are often abused repeatedly.

I don't mean to bash Toronto, I love Toronto. It will be my home forever. However, images keep dancing in my head of beautiful central park, stunning times square, massive empire state building -- and i yearn to go back again one day.

Well, that's all. I am back, Toronto.

Watch out!

Pictures from NY


Yes, yes, I know, I haven't written daily as I promised in the subtitle of my blog. Well, sometimes life just gets in the way, you know.

For now, until I can get my act together and finish up all the work I accumulated while I was in New York, here's some poetry and a few pictures.


By Anne Abbott

They make me live in this little box.
Try as I may to turn the key, it never unlocks.
Inside it’s cramped and dark with no room to grow,
But within my heart hope flickers, and brightly does it glow.
I yearn to spread my wings, and, like a bird, soar!
But first I must find a way to open this caged door.
Through the bars I can see the lucky ones outside –
Upon their sleeves they wear their Rights and Freedoms with
such casualness
That it kills me inside!
They make me live in this little box.
Try as I may to twist the key, it never unlocks.
Each day the box seems to get smaller.
Hope still burns deep within me, but now I have to fight the
urge to scream and holler.
Those lucky ones from outside
Look at me and think I should be satisfied.
I have shelter, they say
And enough to live upon each day.
They don’t understand I want more from life.
They don’t understand my existence is full of strife.
I have so little choice,
And no one seem to listen to my voice.
They make me live in this little box.
Try as I may to rattle the key, it never unlocks.
Sometimes they open the door a crack,
But it always slams back.
Within those few seconds I can see what I need –
I see what I lack.
Disappointment, like a gloomy rain,
Happens to me over and over again.
And sometimes I wonder how much longer I can remain sane.
Still, I must keep my hopes and dreams alive.
It is the only way to survive!
They make me live in this little box.
Try as I may to force the key, it never unlocks.
One day I know the door will swing open and I shall be free.
And then, those lucky ones from the outside will see
That someone like me deserves some dignity.

Sunday, June 15, 2008

As I type this, I yearn to do some painting. And yet, I know that I can't do this today. I'm in a loaner wheelchair from HME. It's crap, and my body doesn't fit into it properly. Still, it's better than nothing, I suppose. I just don't dare paint in it because it's not mine, and I know I'd get paint all over it, which would never come out.

Plus, I'm going to New York with Lenny on Tuesday to attend the Disability Studies Conference, so I need to do a lot of things to get everything ready. I'll have to prepare my employees' payroll so they'll get paid while I'm gone. And, I have to get enough food and necessities for my husband Rob and our two cats, Hershey and Rascal.

I'm going to miss Rob and the two cats, and having my daily Iced Caps at Tim Hortons, and doing my art every night until the early hours of the morning. But, I'm very excited about going to New York! I've never been been before. I'm dying to see the East Village and all of the art galleries. It's going to be so cool!

I love art, Iced Caps, sexy men and cats... This is Hershey, one of my very lovable cats.